Someone like you.

Well yesterday was definitely a waste of me feeling like utter shit all night. Went into the carpark today and Jasmine was snogging his face off just the same as yesterday. I might have done some stupid things in the past, but i wouldn't go as far as saying that he cheated on her with me and even having the messages. I was doing so well, and all I'm doing now is crying and i can't help feeling something for him.
I saw his mum this morning. I pulled into the carpark and saw him car and nearly died. I didn't dare get out of the car at first because i thought it was Jaime. But there was nothing in it and when i was walking to form, his mum was walking past me. She stopped me and asked about what's happening. I didn't really like telling her and it was so awkward because obviously it's her son but I didn't want to lie to her. She said to me that clive and her have always said that me and Jaime are meant to be together. I wish that was true to be honest. I'm always going to love him, always. I really wish things were different and so much better for us. I miss his family so much aswell. Debra said that she's worried about Emilie and she just wants to ring my mum and tell her she was sorry and that she know how she felt with me and Jaime. :( On saturday, I actually felt better knowing that i had him as a friend, atleast he's still a part of me, but messed that up aswell, haven't I.
I'm giving up on school aswell, i just can't be bothered anymore with anything. Anything i do is just the wrong thing anyway. Mum emailed me earlier and said that dads got a job and that they had been looking through university courses and stuff. Maybe i just need to leave this place and start again. I feel like I'm running away but i think a new start is what i need, a chance to change all my mistakes maybe?
Oh jees, I just full on cried my eyes out at oth. This is no good.
it's just not.

I hate to turn up out of the blue uninvited but i couldn't stay away i couldn't fight it. I hoped you see my face and that you'd be remembered that for me, it isn't over. Never mind i'll find someone like you, i wish nothing but the best for you. Don't forget me, i remembered you said, sometimes it lasts in love but sometimes it hurts instead.